Sunday, April 04, 2004

Full moon tonight.

Daylight savings time ended this morning, so we all lost an hour out of the day.

Thursday was nowhere near as exciting as I wrote the other day. Instead it was a pretty normal day. Actually, I can't think of anything that really stands out.

Friday, however, was pretty cool because work paid for all of us to go see Hellboy during the middle of the day. It may be the best adaptation of a comic character to film ever. I really liked Spider-Man and the X-Men movies, but this is probably better than those. It's certainly the truest representation of a comic character on film to date. I'm sure I'll get it on DVD when it comes out. I'm even tempted to see it again in the theatre.

Friday night I went to dinner with Jason and Liz. We went to a place in the mall that we'd heard was pretty good. It was. Then we stopped by Border's afterward and I picked up a couple novels. Two of the novels are short novels based around some of the signature characters from D&D. I'm curious to read those, but I expect them to suck. The other was the new Steven Brust novel. I like his stuff.

We ran into Shane and Cathy at Border's. They'd just left work and decided to do some shopping before heading home. It was fun to chat with them for a bit. It was odd to see them turn up there. Seemed too random to be true for some reason.

Saturday I lazed around, did some reading and then took three bags of carb-filled food from my kitchen to Katie, Kate, and Beth's place. Beth was particularly happy because she's short of cash and now she has a supply of food. I didn't go to their place just for that, actually, they were having a cookout and it was just handy to take the food over at the same time. I had a good time. It was nice and relaxing. It was a nice, low-drama event.

Shana, Shane, and Cathy showed up a while after I got there and were very happy because they'd found a new apartment for Shane and Cathy. They've been talking about moving since Shane returned and it sounds like they found a really nice apartment near Broadway on Capitol Hill -- actually only a short distance from Katie, Kate, and Beth's.

After the cookout, around 8:30, I went over to a party at Jeff's house. Jeff is a gaming buddy that I haven't actually gamed with very much (hardly at all, unfortunately), but I've always liked him. His parties tend to be gamer-filled and surprisingly high-energy and social (for gamers). Unbeknownst to me, since the last time I'd seen Jeff, he's decided/realized that he's transgendered, that is, is actually a woman in a man's body. And he's decided to actually make the transition from one to the other. Great, do what makes you happy. I'm not in his -- now -- her head. I don't know how or why she came to the decision. I don't know what life-event makes you look at things and then want to change sexes and I don't understand it, but if it will make her a happier person, then go for it. It hurts no one. And if it's true, then she'll be much happier -- and if it's not, at least she's out of the gene pool.

Carrie (ne Jeff) may read this and I hope she's not offended by the above. I want her to be happy. I don't care if you're male or female or both or neither. I liked you before and I'll probalby like you now and in the future.

Anyway, the party was a bit off because apart from the socially maladjusted gamers there were also a number of other transgendered people there that Carrie has met over the past months. It made for a weird mix and I got the feeling that there was a humongous elephant in the room and no one was talking about it. It was interesting to watch as everyone socialized and sort of grudgingly accepted that, yeah, maybe everyone was just as messed up as they were. "So, you're a woman in a man's body, eh? You got it easy. I'm a gamer," seemed to be the thought process going on.

Watching Carrie's behaviour got me to thinking. Jeff hadn't been the most manly man ever, but watching her in her new persona of Carrie was intrigueing. Jeff had walked like a guy, talked like a guy, moved like a guy, and . . . well, what the hell does that mean? I don't really know, but I don't think it was an act. I don't think he had to actively make himself behave a certain way. However, now, as Carrie, she's adopted what society views as very feminine traits; everything from holding her shoulders back and thrusting out her non-existent chest, to holding her hand over her mouth and tee-heeing, to how she crossed her legs, to how she stood, to talking in a high voice, to just about everything else.

This got me to wondering; if you weren't acting like this before and this is they way you really are, then why weren't you acting like this before? If it was due to some pressure from society to "act like a man", then why did you care about what society thought -- and if you've changed the way you act now so that you "act like a woman", I mean, why bother? All you're doing now is playing to stereotypes. Playing to what society thinks of as male or female. Who cares? Be yourself.

I don't act a certain way because society demands it. At least I don't think I do. I certainly don't act the way I do 24 hours a day because that's how society thinks I should act. Sure, there may be moments that I don't do things because they're socially unacceptable, but that's really a different matter . . . and my whole personality wouldn't change if I decided to do the things that I think society would find unacceptable. So, why then, has Carrie completely changed her demeanor to fall in line with what society thinks of as female?

I don't have the answers. I hope Carrie does. But honestly, that was the weirdest thing about the whole situation. Do what you need to be happy as long as it doesn't hurt anyone else. I really beleive that. This situation just got me thinking.

Kinda heavy for a Monday morning, eh?


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